My Childhood Fairytale Fantasy
I read an article from Emery Gondor's book Art and Play Therapy from an Adlerian concepts and application book compilation, which I have been reading in the past few weeks. Art and play are a child's medium of expression which reminds me of my own childhood. I was solitary, shy, dependent, and less of a talker than I am now. I liked paper dolls so much to the point of even sketching and cutting my own paper dolls and chose my own characters. If I remembered right, I wasn't at all showing my own family events, but was presenting my own fairy tale fantasies. All I wanted was to become a princess with those beautiful tiaras, dresses, and shoes. So in my play, there would always be a princess (me) and a slave, particularly a girl slave--someone who I can command and demand. Probably because I was so dependent with my parents, I had no voice, I never had the courage to voice out, and try to initiate things; I wanted to become boss in my little world of fantasy. My mum (mother) was the bossy type, so that's where I get that ideal attitude as a child, but I am never bossy at all, not even now. And then, there wouldn't be a princess without a kingdom, would there? So I made sure I structured/built very well my kingdom using books and a small cottage I built using papers. The paper cottage would depict the poverty a slave deserve--my ideals as a child. So what's the issue about the slave thing? I wanted someone below me. Sounds more like Lavinia and Princess Sarah. haha. The only difference is that I was not rude with my slave. In fact, I was at all friendly but only a bit bossy only because I was the princess. It's like my fate and hers. Anyway, since I was the princess, I had all the nice dresses and a very huge golden mirror, where I look at my self at my mirror. (Now, I am really taking!!) Well, my princess paper doll looks at her mirror and she was so pretty, and prettiest among all the princesses. Gosh! this was what I got from watching princess cartoons. And a princess wouldn't be a princess without her knight and shinning armour, yes I had a prince paper doll which I drew and cut. And they lived happily ever after. Haha, you know I feel good while recalling my past. Today I learned something about my self and my childhood self. One is that I am greatly influenced with my environment. Another is that I wasn't who I am today. That's a good sign, don't you think?
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